Memories...

After a bulk of grief work has been done, the letting go of what was and what could have been, what's left is a blanket of emotions.
The blanket is sometimes heavy, like it was yesterday when I saw a bench, and this morning, when the air was crisp and smelled of spring, when I realized what date it was this past weekend.
Filled with memories and the emotions connected with those memories. Memories of this time last year, when the seasons were changing, when the weather was starting to get warmer.
The memories wash over me and drench me in the happiness and the sadness.
I let them soak in. I take them at face value. There is no longing for the past, nor an impatientness for the future, just the sadness of the memories and how they came to be.
When the grief was raw, it was so complex. There were so many pieces and layers to it that one could not even begin to deconstruct it.
But now, 11 months later, the grief seems to have become rather simplistic.
What's left are just memories and emotion elicited from the memories.
I guess the final stage would be when the memories no longer make me sad...
But if I don't get there for awhile, or ever, I'm perfectly content to stay here, where the grief is simple and I still remember.....I still remember her.